Meet a volunteer...Isabel

I started volunteering back in October. I needed to find something meaningful to do for the volunteering part of my DofE, and I knew I wanted to do something that involved working with people. My mum actually visits Milward House sometimes, and she said it was a really lovely home—so I decided to give it a go. I’ve never looked back!

When I arrive on a Wednesday evening, ‘family members’ (those who live with us), are usually getting ready for supper. I go around and have a chat with people to see how they’re doing, ask about their day, and then help in the dining room. I often sit with Anne and Anthea during supper, catch up with them while they eat, and help out with handing out aprons or pouring drinks. Afterwards, we head back to the lounge where I chat with a few more family members. On the surface, it might just look like chatting, but it’s really meaningful. I’ve learned that taking the time to talk, to listen, and just be present can make a real difference.

Spending time with older people, especially those living with dementia, has taught me so much. It can be hard when someone is confused or having a difficult day but when you sit down, look them in the eye, and listen, there’s a real connection. Some days, you get to have incredible conversations about their lives. Other times, it’s the simple comfort of sitting quietly together or singing a hymn.

One family member who really stood out to me was Alan. He sadly passed away a few months ago, but we had some amazing conversations, especially around Christmas. He’d served in Germany after the war, and he had strong views about national service. We actually disagreed on a few things politically, but I really valued those conversations. He was open, passionate, and full of stories.

I also have an incredible bond with Rachel. Sometimes she gets a bit lost in conversation, but then she’ll just hold my hands and sing a hymn to me, smiling so warmly. It’s those little moments that stay with you. She’s also always trying to share her food with me—which is sweet and a little funny. I’m always saying, “No, Rachel, I’m going home to eat!”

There was one time where things got a little tense between two family members, one who had dementia. They weren’t really understanding each other and it was getting confusing for everyone involved. So, I took the family member with dementia out for a walk around the home, and we went to look for Millie, the home’s cat. It was such a simple but lovely way to calm things down. That family member loves Millie, and just chatting about the cat was a nice way to reconnect and shift the mood.

Volunteering at Milward House has changed my perspective of older people. It’s made me feel more grateful, especially when family members talk about their relatives, or people they’ve lost. I go home feeling thankful for the people in my own life and more present when I’m with them.