Donning a pair of goggles partially obscured by sticky tape, with socks on my hands and my arms pinned behind me with a stretchy band, I, alongside my fellow training participants, headed tentatively down the corridor at Shottermill House.

The purpose was to give us a sense of how the world might feel to an older person whose eyesight and fine motor skills are declining, something which is particularly prevalent in those living with dementia. We all agreed it was highly disorienting, affecting spatial awareness and balance. The thing I found most strange was not being able to see my own hands. Partway through, we were invited to sit down on a chair and get up again – no mean feat when your vision and movement are impaired.

This immersive exercise was one of a host of ways we were prompted to empathise with those living with us. Although not every person living in our care homes has dementia, a high proportion are affected at some level, and so this aspect of care was explored in great depth, in the context of relational care for everyone.

At Pilgrims’ Friend Society, we take a ‘whole home’ approach to care, with each staff member receiving training in The Way We Care, our charity’s bespoke approach to caring for people as individuals. We train all staff - from the office to the maintenance team - in this approach because it encompasses so much more than the basic tasks of physically providing personal care.

It's for that reason that I, as Communications and PR Manager, was at Shottermill House for training alongside carers, housekeepers, a Hummingbird, the administrator and the business manager, as well as colleagues from the Marketing and Communications Team. The session was led by Friederike Hamilton, our overall The Way We Care Lead. Eliza, the new Wellbeing and Dementia Lead, was also present as, going forwards, she will oversee the team at the home as they put the training into practice.

We also reflected on Psalm 92, a favourite passage at Pilgrims’ Friend Society, which reminds us that God still has a purpose for us in older age. As we read in verse 14, ‘They will still bear fruit in old age, they will stay fresh and green...’

We then moved to considering positive and negative care actions, with reference to a video clip featuring David Sheard, a leading voice in the field of dementia care. Using the example of making toast, Sheard highlights a spectrum of approaches ranging from ‘positive social’, where you join the person by having some toast yourself and bring the experience to life by evoking the senses and memory, through to a ‘negative restrictive’ approach where a person’s request is rebuffed with a curt ‘don’t be silly you’ve had three slices already’.

Reflecting on our likes and dislikes served as a springboard to thinking about the importance of knowing the person you are caring for really well, not just the headlines but the details, too. For example, handing a small fluffy animal to someone when a petting farm comes to visit might not go down well if they have a lifelong fear of rats, even if they do like animals in general.

We ended the session by going through the GEMS, a way of thinking about the stages of dementia designed by Teepa Snow. The videos about the GEMs are online and are worth a watch for anyone seeking to understand the progression of dementia better, including how it affects a person in a multitude of ways, not just memory.